Looking at myself and the people around me, I realize that many times we are in a bystander mode, life just happens to us and we keep going in whatever direction life seems to be happening to us. While the Bystander Effect is a social psychological phenomenon according to which the probability of helping a victim is inversely related to the number of bystanders, I believe sometimes in life, we get into this bystander mode whenever we get a lot of stuff thrown at us and we don’t really want something enough to go in one direction or the other. This way, we just sort of remain frozen in a moment, while life, opportunities, and love sometimes pass us by without even realizing what is going on around us. Life is just happening and we’re along for the ride…and not in a good way.
Now being a bystander is not all bad. There are a lot of moments when it’s good to sit back, relax, and watch life unfold before us, but that usually comes after a lot of inspired action when we went for what we wanted, we took our leap of faith, and now we can wait for the fruits of our labor to come back to us. What I’m talking about here is the bystander mode that we look back on and wonder “What on earth were we doing? What were we waiting for? The one where we know life is passing us by and we should do something, take some action, yet we just sit back as if we have all the time in the world and we have no control over our lives.
Looking at my life, I can recognize a lot of times when I was a mere bystander of my life happening and as much as I wish I could get that time back, I know the only thing I can do to honor those moments is to actually look in the present, recognize what I’m doing right now and make a difference today. We never believe it until we’re faced with the hard truth, but tomorrow is never promised, maybe our circumstances will be better by themselves, maybe they won’t. What I’m standing for today is a space where we refuse to be bystanders in our lives, where we take inspired action, we make a difference, we live today, not yesterday or tomorrow.