CG Jung once said: “I am not what happened to me, I am who I choose to become.” It got me thinking once again about how much value we put as people on who we have been up until now and on our inability to change for the better. I’m clearly not referring to all the good things we are, those values that are powerful and empowering, the ones that give us the momentum to move forward even when things get tough. I don’t wake up every day thinking “I’ve been kind up until yesterday, but I think I’d like to change that”. Kindness is something we all should have more of, not less.
Even though our lives and our realities, even our bodies change every single day, we somehow still put a lot of value on the un-changeability of ourselves, as if we’re somehow set in stone, incapable of moving or changing direction, incapable of making ourselves better, releasing fear and negativity every day to the point where we end up valuing being stuck just because we’re afraid to risk moving forward and being the person we dream of being. As if somehow the person we are today isn’t the product of the choices we’ve made, but instead a personality type we were given.
A long time ago a friend of mine who is a personal trainer told me that genetics plays a part in the type of body you have, but it doesn’t play a part in the type of body you choose to have. You may be naturally tall and lanky, or you may have a tendency to gain weight easily, or you may be one of those people I call “skinny fat people” (aka. You eat like crazy, more than you should, faster than you should, and definitely fattier than you should, yet you somehow are still skinny), but what you do with the gene configuration you were given is entirely up to you. You can either say it is what it is, there’s nothing I can do about it, or you can completely transform your body the way you want to. Now it might take hard work, but believe me all those people you look at and admire their bodies, they put a lot of hard work into it too, six-packs are not genetic.
Now that you have a frame of reference with how change happens in your body, let’s talk about how change happens in your heart. When you want to change your body, you start every day by changing your diet, working out, and making better choices every day. Well it’s the same thing when you change something about your behavior or your heart that you may not like or that doesn’t serve you anymore. You start every day by making better choices, by improving things one step at a time. You will have cheat days, you will have off days, you will have those days which are the equivalent of eating an entire cake in one sitting, yet as long as those are just random moments once in a while, then you’re on the right track. You may have moments when you look at yourself and you feel proud and you may have moments when you feel you’re moving to slow. They’re all part of the process, they’re all part of the growth that’s happening inside your heart, part of you shedding your old skin and stepping into your new self.
With that in mind, who you were a year ago, a month ago, or even a day ago won’t matter because you will understand that it’s never about who you were it’s always about who you are now and who you are becoming every day from now on. What will you do today to become the person you dream of being?